week at the gym

Received this from a colleague today, and it made me laugh so much I nearly choked on my scone. Do read and spread this among friends...


Dear Diary,
For my birthday this year, I purchased a week of personal training at the local health club. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Christo, who identified himself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear.

Friends seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.

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MONDAY:Started my day at 6:00 am. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Christo waiting for me. He is something of a Greek god - with blond hair, dancing eyes, and a dazzling white smile. Woohoo!!!

Christo gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skilful way in which he conducted his aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring!

Christo was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time he was around.

This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!

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TUESDAY:I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Christo made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then he put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. His rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT! It's a whole new life for me.

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WEDNESDAY:The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.Christo was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. His voice is a little too perky for that early in the morning and when he scolds, he gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying.My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Christo put me on the stair monster. Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Christo told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. He said some other shit too.

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THURSDAY:Asshole was waiting for me with his vampire-like teeth exposed as his thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour late - it took me that long to tie my shoes.He took me to work out with dumbbells. When he was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom. He sent some skinny bitch to find me.Then, as punishment, he put me on the rowing machine - which I sank.

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FRIDAY:I hate that bastard Christo more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anaemic, anorexic, little aerobic instructor. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat him with it.Christo wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if you don't want dents in the floor, don't hand me the damn barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich.The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

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SATURDAY:Satan left a message on my answering machine in his grating, shrill voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing his voice made me want to smash the machine with my planner; however, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel...

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SUNDAY:I'm having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my husband will choose a gift for me that is fun - like a root canal or a hysterectomy. I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!


Have a nice weekend

orange, almond and chocolate cake

It was hubby's birthday last Monday, and this year he requested a chocolate and orange cake. So his beloved wife, yo, did some research and baked this orange, almond and chocolate cake. It wasn't as good as I had hope for, but hubby is really happy with it. So I guess it's still acceptable. The next time I'm baking this, will definitely make some changes to the recipe.

Happy Birthday darling hubby!!!

Have a nice day

quiche lorraine

Went to John Lewis last weekend and got myself a dream food processor that can do magic. This is seriously so cool. No more painstakingly slicing potatoes into 1/2 inch slices, or kneading dough for ages. Now I have a trusty food processor that can do all the hard work within seconds. It's all thanks to all the wonderful people out there for their lovely wedding vouchers.

While I was there, I got myself a flan dish and I told hubby - "Whether you like it or not, I'm making quiche for dinner tomorrow. It's not open up for discussion". Hahaahhahaha...So here's my first ever quiche lorraine - love it!!!

If anyone will like the recipe, buzz me :)

Have a nice day.

pork belly rice

Whenever I misses home, I will definitely make this dish. The aroma is so nostalgic, and it's so tasty I can eat so much more than my usual intake of rice. I always warn hubby no smart comments about me pigging out on this dish. And I always make sambal ikan bilis to go with it. It's never the same without the sambal.

If anyone wants the recipe, buzz me :)

Have a nice day

cny 2010 & valentine's day

this chinese new year, hubby and i were not able to go back to celebrate this festive season with my family. however, hubby wants me to celebrate chinese new year over here even if it's just for a day. so on eve, i made mee sua and hubby made pork satay and peanut sauce. it was yummy-licious.

then on chinese new year day, we invited hubby's parents over to have a simple meal. hubby asked if i wanted to have friends over and have a small-ish party. i was worried that i might be too stressed out about food, so i choose to have family members instead. so i made stir-fry mixed veg, mushrooms with minced meat fillings, steam fish with soy sauce and spicy nyonya chicken. to finish off the meal, i made red bean jelly. it didn't quite turn out the way i wanted it to but it was good nonetheless...hahahaha....

and for valentine's, hubby got me this...

Happy Chinese New Year and Happy Valentine's Day :)

decision

When marriage was first mentioned, I was uncertain and worried if he was Mr Right. The initial feelings wasn't like what I've read in love novels when I was a teenager. There wasn't any surge of happiness or the feeling of shouting 'OH YES!!!' to the world. To be honest, I was scared. More like scared shitless. All sorts of scenarios, reasons, possibilities and consequences kept going through my head - to the point I'm doubting his motives for wanting to marry me. And after 3 weeks, I still couldn't give him a straight forward answer.

After nearly a month of brain-cracking pondering, we arranged to meet at the train station after work for dinner at our favourite Chinese restaurant. I got to the train station 10 minutes earlier than expected. As I was standing there waiting for him in the cold and getting slightly annoyed at him for being late and the crowd for being 'crowdy', I saw him running towards me with a big smile on his face. And everyone else just blurred out of focus. I don't feel cold or annoyed anymore. It felt like the sun was shining on me and there were birds chirping and butterflies everywhere. I was really happy to see him, and I was smilling like an idiot at him while waiting for him to make his way to me. That was the moment I decide to marry him. And I'm really glad I did.

Have a nice day.

why oh why

have you ever been given things to do because whoever is suppose to be doing it decide not to? reason given...oh i'm sick, and i'll be taking a month off. so now, who is going to be doing all these outstanding tasks? oh, please don't be mistaken. i did not volunteer myself. i'm not mad or stupid. why do someone else's job when i'm not paid to do it?

i wasn't given the choice to say no. i wasn't inform that i'll be taking over. it just sort of landed on my lap and told to get on with it. this is so unfair!!!!! and before i could take in *as in understand all the do's and don'ts of this bloody !@#$% tasks* i've got people calling in to see me to discuss about this. i didn't know i was given only 10 seconds to understand this bloody !@#$% tasks. and the worse part is, when i approach other colleagues that have experienced in dealing with this, i was turn down very unsympathetically. they, obviously, don't want to get involved in something they are not paid to do. but it's fine to them that suddenly this is my responsibility, EVEN WHEN I AM NOT PAID TO DO THIS!!!!

tell me whhyyyyy...*think BSB-I want it that way*...at home, i moan, whine and complain. in the office, i put a brave face on and got on with it. yes, i did sort out this bloody !@#$% mess. and yes, there are people that were grateful for my contribution. did all these comments make me feel good??? NO!!! i felt used and taken advantage of.

oh, and management did not pay me more or increase my pay for the extra work.

tell me wwwhhhyyyyy...
Ain't nothin' but a heartache...
tell me wwwhhhyyyyy...
Ain't nothin' but a shitty mess
tell me wwwhhhyyyyy...
I never want to be in this position again
!@#$%^&*()

have a nice day